EXPECTATIONS

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Expectations

#funny #woman #man #fail #bride #groom #omg #wtf #feature #people #others #reactions

New jokes

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Private investigator
A guy believed that his wife is cheating on him, so he hired a private investigator. The cheapest he could find was a Chinese man. This was the Chinese PI's report about what he found: "Most honorable, sir. You leave house. I watch house. He come to house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss she. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with me. I fall out tree. I not see. No fee. Cheng Lee."

Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.

50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Truck driver
A man was driving and saw a truck stalled on the side of the highway that had ten penguins standing next to it. The man pulled over and asked the truck driver if he needed any help. The truck driver replied, "If you can take these penguins to the zoo while I wait for AAA that will be great!" The man agreed and the penguins hopped into the back of his car. Two hours later, the trucker was back on the road again and decided to check on the penguins. He showed up at the zoo and they weren't there! He headed back into his truck and started driving around the town, looking for any sign of the penguins, the man, or his car. While driving past a movie theater, the truck driver spotted the guy walking out with the ten penguins. The truck driver yelled, "What are you doing? You were supposed to take them to the zoo!" The man replied, "I did and then I had some extra money so I took them to go see a movie."

DonĀ“t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.