IF YOU CAN READ THIS I´M DRUNK

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If you can read this I´m drunk

#laundry #funny #woman #girl #things #feature #people

New jokes

Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!

Helium
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.

Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.

Lost in desert
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

Guys on the roof
On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white. The asian walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and jumps off the roof. Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all my people" and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the black guy's turn. The black guy walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and then throws the white guy off the roof.