If you can read this I´m drunk
#laundry #funny #woman #girl #things #feature #people
Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.
Mummy´s music
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!
Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road?
A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"
Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death?
Employee: No, because there is no proof of it.
Boss: Well there is now !
Employee: How?
Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left
Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.
Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.
Pregnant woman
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman.
Boy: Why do you look so fat?
Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me.
Boy: Is it a good baby?
Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby.
Boy: Then why did you eat it?!
50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.