CAR HAND

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Car hand

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New jokes

Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.

Bug in soup
A boy asks his father, "Dad, are bugs good to eat?" "That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner," the dad replies. After dinner the father asks, "Now, son, what did you want to ask me?" "Oh, nothing," the boy says. "There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone."

Man vs priest
Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.” The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.” Man: “And that frees me from my sin?” Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.