Crazy cat
#cat #cats #animal #funny #eat #eating #hungry #crazy #animals #feature #food
Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
Pregnant woman
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman.
Boy: Why do you look so fat?
Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me.
Boy: Is it a good baby?
Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby.
Boy: Then why did you eat it?!
50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Six."
Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven!"
Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"
Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"
Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.
Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!