Photo vs reality
#cute #sweet #funny #woman #happy #excited #shower #cool #take a photo #swimming suit #feature #people #emotion #activities #things
Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.
50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!
Mummy´s music
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!
School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?"
Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!"
Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?"
Patrick: "What school?"
Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Student: "Meat!"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"
Student: "Bacon!"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
Student: "Homework!"