SELFIE

1737.jpg

Selfie

#funny #men #women #fail #happy #ironic #take a photo #feature #people #others #emotion #activities

New jokes

Chinese girl
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.

Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."

Microwave oven
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.

Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.

Pregnant woman
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman. Boy: Why do you look so fat? Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me. Boy: Is it a good baby? Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby. Boy: Then why did you eat it?!