Metal dog
#animal #white #funny #lie #bored #tired #dog #path #road #relax #animals #color #feature #activities #emotion #nature
Don“t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road?
A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"
Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!
Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him.
At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison
Claustrophobic
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
A BLONDE & HER THERMOS
A blonde notices that her coworker has a thermos, so she asks him what it's for. He responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
The blonde immediately buys one for herself. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it.
Her coworker asks, "What do you have in it?"
She replies, "Soup and ice cream."
Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.