Hospital breakfast
#funny #fail #meal #food #wtf #salame #feature #others #food #reactions
Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him.
At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison
Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?"
"Where the babies come from, darling."
"In the stork?"
Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death?
Employee: No, because there is no proof of it.
Boss: Well there is now !
Employee: How?
Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left
Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.
Google
Q: Is Google male or female?
A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Don“t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Microwave oven
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.