"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!
Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.
Lost in desert
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!