HAPPY EASTER

Happy easter

#cute #green #egg #easter #spring #feature #color #food #nature

New jokes

Santas sack
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.

Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Six." Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven!" Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!" Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"

Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left

Private investigator
A guy believed that his wife is cheating on him, so he hired a private investigator. The cheapest he could find was a Chinese man. This was the Chinese PI's report about what he found: "Most honorable, sir. You leave house. I watch house. He come to house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss she. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with me. I fall out tree. I not see. No fee. Cheng Lee."

Claustrophobic
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"