ESCALATOR FAIL STAIRS

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Escalator fail stairs

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New jokes

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.

Months
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.

Guys on the roof
On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white. The asian walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and jumps off the roof. Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all my people" and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the black guy's turn. The black guy walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and then throws the white guy off the roof.

LIGHTS OFF
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.