NEVER OBSOLETE

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Never obsolete

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New jokes

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.

Lost in desert
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!

Fat momma
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."

Christmas gift
A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"