MONEY EVERYWHERE

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Money in living room

#money #funny #boss #cool #things #feature #people

New jokes

Man vs priest
Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.” The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.” Man: “And that frees me from my sin?” Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!

Beans
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."

Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"

Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.