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New jokes

Claustrophobic
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.

Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Christmas gift
A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."

Trick-or-treating
A little kid was out trick-or-treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He rang a house's doorbell and the door was opened by a lady. "Oh, how cute! A little pirate! And where are your buccaneers?" she asked. The boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99