Funny elephan with shoes
#animal #funny #crazy #running #runner #elephant #animals #feature #sports
Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.
Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
Harry Potter
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.
Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!
Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.
Pregnant woman
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman.
Boy: Why do you look so fat?
Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me.
Boy: Is it a good baby?
Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby.
Boy: Then why did you eat it?!
Unhappy day
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for a half hour. Then a big trouble making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, & just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that," the man replies, wiping his tears, "This day is the worst of my life. First, I oversleep & I go in late to my office. My outraged boss fires me. When I leave the building to go to my car, I find out it was stolen. The police say they can do nothing. I get a cab to go home, & when I get out, I remember I left my wallet. The cab driver just drives away. I go inside my house where I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave my home, come to this bar, & just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up & drink my poison."
Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.