ANGRY PANDA

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Angry panda cooking

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New jokes

A BLONDE & HER THERMOS
A blonde notices that her coworker has a thermos, so she asks him what it's for. He responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The blonde immediately buys one for herself. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it. Her coworker asks, "What do you have in it?" She replies, "Soup and ice cream."

Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

Months
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.