Santa claus dancing with reindeers
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"
How were people born
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.