Simon Cowell is depressed
#funny #angry #men #man #frustrated #mad #depressed #upset #comedian #offended #feature #emotion #people #celebrities
Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!
Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road?
A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"
Microwave oven
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Mummy´s music
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!
Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him.
At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison
Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99