CAT IS SLEEPING

Cat is sleeping

#cat #cute #cats #animal #sleep #sleeping #lie #lying #massage #massages #scratch #black #animals #feature #activities #color

New jokes

Man vs priest
Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.” The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.” Man: “And that frees me from my sin?” Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.

Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."

Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.

Helium
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.

Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!

Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!