NEMO WITH DAD

Nemo with dad

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New jokes

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.

Months
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Reporter vs man
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

Kids conversation
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin." Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ." Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."