SCREAMING MONSTER

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Screaming monster

#angry #cartoon #mad #scream #upset #green #monsters #wazowski #emotion #things #activities #color #celebrities

New jokes

How were people born
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.

Man vs priest
Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.” The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.” Man: “And that frees me from my sin?” Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Claustrophobic
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"

Lost in desert
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."