FANTASTIC

Fantastic

#animal #satisfied #cartoon #mouse #happy #excited #ice age #animals #emotion #things #celebrities

New jokes

Truck driver
A man was driving and saw a truck stalled on the side of the highway that had ten penguins standing next to it. The man pulled over and asked the truck driver if he needed any help. The truck driver replied, "If you can take these penguins to the zoo while I wait for AAA that will be great!" The man agreed and the penguins hopped into the back of his car. Two hours later, the trucker was back on the road again and decided to check on the penguins. He showed up at the zoo and they weren't there! He headed back into his truck and started driving around the town, looking for any sign of the penguins, the man, or his car. While driving past a movie theater, the truck driver spotted the guy walking out with the ten penguins. The truck driver yelled, "What are you doing? You were supposed to take them to the zoo!" The man replied, "I did and then I had some extra money so I took them to go see a movie."

Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Fat momma
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."

Mummy´s music
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!

A BLONDE & HER THERMOS
A blonde notices that her coworker has a thermos, so she asks him what it's for. He responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The blonde immediately buys one for herself. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it. Her coworker asks, "What do you have in it?" She replies, "Soup and ice cream."

Chinese girl
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.