SANTA IS SHOPPING

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Santa is shopping

#christmas #crazy #santa claus #winter #shopping #winter #feature #activities

New jokes

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.

Lost in desert
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Fat momma
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."

MY WIFE AND I ARE REALLY IN SYNC
If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to f**king leave.

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.