THINKING HOMER

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Thinking homer

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New jokes

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Microwave oven
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Christmas gift
A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."

A BLONDE & HER THERMOS
A blonde notices that her coworker has a thermos, so she asks him what it's for. He responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The blonde immediately buys one for herself. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it. Her coworker asks, "What do you have in it?" She replies, "Soup and ice cream."

Claustrophobic
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.