HYPNOTIZED SIMPSONS

Hypnotized simpsons

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New jokes

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

LIGHTS OFF
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

Harry Potter
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.

Christmas gift
A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."

Helium
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.