SNOWBOARDER JUMPS

Snowboarder jumps

#white #jump #jumping #snow #sport #sports #winter #snowboard #cold #ice #color #sports #winter

New jokes

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

Microwave oven
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.

Where do babies come from
A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.” The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s how you get a baby, honey.” The child seems to comprehend. “Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy’s penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?” “Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.”

Mummy´s music
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!

Bug in soup
A boy asks his father, "Dad, are bugs good to eat?" "That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner," the dad replies. After dinner the father asks, "Now, son, what did you want to ask me?" "Oh, nothing," the boy says. "There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone."

Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!

Claustrophobic
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"