Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.
Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison
Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!
Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!
Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.