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New jokes

Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.

Pregnant woman
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman. Boy: Why do you look so fat? Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me. Boy: Is it a good baby? Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby. Boy: Then why did you eat it?!

Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left

Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Private investigator
A guy believed that his wife is cheating on him, so he hired a private investigator. The cheapest he could find was a Chinese man. This was the Chinese PI's report about what he found: "Most honorable, sir. You leave house. I watch house. He come to house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss she. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with me. I fall out tree. I not see. No fee. Cheng Lee."