Cat is sleeping in the box
#cat #cute #cats #animal #sweet #white #cute cat #sleep #sleeping #lie #lying #tired #exhausted #beauty #flower #animals #feature #color #activities #emotion #nature
School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?"
Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!"
Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?"
Patrick: "What school?"
Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.
Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?"
"Where the babies come from, darling."
"In the stork?"
Google
Q: Is Google male or female?
A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
Harry Potter
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.