HYPNOTIZED

1149.gif

Hypnotized

#look #looking #funny #bored #watch #watching #annoyed #hypnotized #blue #activities #feature #emotion #color

New jokes

Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.

Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.

Fat momma
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Trick-or-treating
A little kid was out trick-or-treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He rang a house's doorbell and the door was opened by a lady. "Oh, how cute! A little pirate! And where are your buccaneers?" she asked. The boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.

Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.

Birthday
Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.