DEPRESSED WOMAN

Depressed woman

#woman #girl #cartoon #frustrated #crying #depressed #sad #blonde #rain #thinking #people #things #emotion #nature

New jokes

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

Harry Potter
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.

Birthday
Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.

MY WIFE AND I ARE REALLY IN SYNC
If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to f**king leave.

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.