Lightning Solitaire

Play your cards as fast as lightning. Move your cards to the 4 cards in the centre. Place cards that are 1 more or 1 less in value depending on the arrows below the centre cards.

#puzzle #card #solitaire

New jokes

Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99

Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"

50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

A BLONDE & HER THERMOS
A blonde notices that her coworker has a thermos, so she asks him what it's for. He responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The blonde immediately buys one for herself. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it. Her coworker asks, "What do you have in it?" She replies, "Soup and ice cream."

Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Six." Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven!" Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!" Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"

Chinese girl
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."