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Klondike solitaire game for Christmas: move all cards to the top 4 stacks from Ace to King. On the tableau place cards in descending order and alternate color. Click on the top left stack to get a new open card.
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Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!
Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Six."
Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven!"
Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"
Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"
Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.
Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.
Months
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.
Bug in soup
A boy asks his father, "Dad, are bugs good to eat?" "That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner," the dad replies. After dinner the father asks, "Now, son, what did you want to ask me?" "Oh, nothing," the boy says. "There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone."
Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.