Hearts

After looking at his or her hand, each player chooses three cards and passes them face down to another player. All players must pass their own cards before looking at the cards received from an opponent. The passing rotation is: 1. to the player on your left, 2 to the player on your right, 3 to the player across the table, 4. no passing. This rotation repeats until the game ends.The player holding the 2 of clubs (after the passing) plays that card to start the first trick. Each player must follow suit if possible. If a player has no cards in the suit led, a card of any other suit may be discarded. Exception: If a player has no clubs when the first trick is led, a heart or the Queen of Spades cannot be played.The highest card of the suit led wins a trick (there is no trumps in this game). The winner of the trick gets all the cards and starts the next trick. Hearts may not be led until a heart or the Queen of Spades has been played (this is called 'breaking' hearts). The Queen of Spades can be led at any time. At the end of each hand, the number of hearts a player has taken, is counted; they count for 1 point each. The Queen of Spades is 13 points. If a player has won all 13 hearts and the Queen of Spades, that player can choose to subtract 26 points from his score, or to add 26 points to every other player's score.Hearts is played to 100 points, when a player reaches this score, the game ends. The player with the lowest score wins.

#board #skill #solitaire

New jokes

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

MY WIFE AND I ARE REALLY IN SYNC
If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to f**king leave.

Months
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.

Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"

Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.

Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!