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New jokes

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Trick-or-treating
A little kid was out trick-or-treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He rang a house's doorbell and the door was opened by a lady. "Oh, how cute! A little pirate! And where are your buccaneers?" she asked. The boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."

Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left

Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

Lost in desert
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.

Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.